Tuesday, November 2, 2010

My latest gimmick

The fact is that I have been exercising on a regular basis in the last few weeks, and in spite of eating more, my weight has not changed. Also static, but less encouraging, are my body measurements.

With the three week extension to the Catwoman Competition, I have decided to take desperate measures. I will be attending Bikram Yoga classes for the month of November. My friend, the Storymaster insists that this is a surefire way to melt away the fat. Having only tried it once before, I can vouch that it is debatable form of torture.

Madonna does Ashtanga yoga, and she has zero body fat. I have been told that my hands look like Madonna's so perhaps doing Bikram Yoga will cause this similarity to spread throughout my body. One guy doesn't think Bikram Yoga is healthy for Madonna. Well, that's enough faulty logic for today. See you at the sweat mark.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Catwoman Competition results: inconclusive

At the finale of the Catwoman Competition, body measurements were quickly forgotten as competitors gorged on homemade baked goods by Flocons, and a sushi party tray. The competitors were then distracted by the need to show off their costumes to unwilling spectators, like friend and non-follower of Thinspiration XXL, Senan. Fortunately, Senan's child was already safely ensconced in bed, and did not have her Halloween ruined by six creepy adults.

After sorely testing the hospitality of Senan, the competitors returned to the home of Flocons and Royal Pinguo to play Just Dance 2 on the Wii, with the body parts of Jon Levy distributed to the winner of each round. This will be news to Jon Levy, who assumes that cannibalism is simply a topic of debate, rather than a real personal concern.

Frankly, no one looked good in a catsuit, even prior to the binge eating that has become status quo at Thinspiration XXL events. Hence, the 'Catwoman' competition will continue and conclude on Beautiful Day: November 20.

Save the date by marking it on your calendars (especially you, Jon Levy, you tasty, tasty morsel).