Unless Doctor Cook and Royal Pinguo have achieved massive weight loss (or any weight loss, in Doctor Cook's case), it looks like I have come out on top again this week. I would like to thank Flocons's boss for putting his nose to the grindstone, thus allowing his backside to relax and have some Swiss Chalet.
With roughly five pounds to go before I reach my lowest adult weight, I know that I have a difficult road ahead of me. The last five pounds are known in weight loss folklore as the hardest lose.
To keep my motivation up, I have decided to focus on a new diet: a clothing diet. Dieters are restricted to six items of clothing for a month (does not include underwear). It is the antidote to the consumer binge that usually occurs after claiming that one has "nothing to wear".
An even stricter diet, the Great American Apparel Diet, bars dieters from buying for an entire year. That goal is pretty much on par with an Ironman triathlon in my mind - inspiring but not within my abilities.
With all the sweating that I have done as a result of the heat and exercise, I think I may have to postpone the clothing diet until fall arrives. But, imagine how satisfying it will be to wear the same clothes for a month, continue to lose weight, then discover that you must replace your entire wardrobe because nothing fits anymore. The anti-consumerist message is lost, but the end result is charity: I will give all my fat clothes to my fat friends.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Fatty Weigh-in: Week 3
| Competitor | Current Weight | Tally | Total |
| celestialspeedster | 123 lbs | - 1 lb | - 6 lbs ( - 4.7%) |
| Doctor Cook | ??? lbs | ? lb | + 1 lb ( + 0.6%) |
| Flocons | 203 lbs | - 2 lbs | - 9 lbs ( - 4.2%) |
| Opiate | 181 lbs | - 1 lb | - 2 lb ( - 1%) |
| Royal Pinguo | 141 lbs | - 1 lb | - 3 lb ( - 2.1%) |
| Thorn | 172 lbs | - 0 lbs | - 4 lbs ( - 2.3%) |
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Inner City Pressure
This has not been a good week for me. There has been a lot of pressure at work, and I've been working late pretty much every day. It's not a good environment for weight loss. Some people lose weight when they are stressed, and some people gain weight. I am solidly in the latter group. When faced with stress, I eat junk and don't exercise. It's a common problem for a lot of people. Simply put, after a week like this, I would be putting on a lot of pounds.
In the heat of the moment, I went to my comfort food... Swiss Chalet. My brain approved of the sudden influx of food, sugar, and salt... a welcome emotional escape from the stress at hand, albeit temporary. Ironically, it was my stomach that disapproved. To my surprise, the recent training of eating less for dinner had brought my stomach on side with the virtues of Thinspiration XXL. It groaned that I had eaten too much, too fast, and too late. My brain (normally the champion of my weight loss initiative) looked down in shame. With my stomach as a newfound ally, I spent the last few days trying to get back on track. Is it too little too late? We'll know tomorrow at the weigh-in.
PS: Flight of the Conchords FTW!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Where are all the fatties?
As everyone knows, skinny people are better than everyone else. Here are some reasons why:
1. They are more attractive.
2. They typically sweat less and so have less body odor than all the rest of you fatties.
3. They present less of a drain on the health care system.
4. Kate Moss says so.
5. Weight loss inspires charity. Bowflex spokesman Brian Alvarez understands this:
And you *should* feel great Brian. Keep up the good work!
...
Since we've begun this competition, I feel thinner and therefore better than before. And, as such, I feel the need, nay, the right to gawk at all the fatties of the world.
As I've mentioned earlier, I'm currently in Boston. While on my way here, I thought, what better place than the United States of America to scope out and leer at fatties? Sadly, I have been sorely mislead. After almost one week of living here, I must ask the question: "Where are all the fatties?"
Television would have you believe that 63% of American adults are overweight or obese . Yet, where are they? They should be hard to miss. I examined a number of locations, from sports bars, to Best Buy, to Fenway stadium, home of the baseball team, the Boston Red Sox. And yet, nowhere near even 50% of individuals were giant fatties. The hero of baseball, Babe Ruth, was so grossly obese that he was unable to run his own bases. But his fans, who don't even do so much as swing a bat, are often reasonably thin. What is wrong with this dangerously underweight picture of Boston?
Someone is lying to us. Either Americans are not all fatties. Or Boston represents a low-fat oasis within America. While the humanitarian in me applauds the fact that so many people here are skinny and therefore better, the sadist in me laments my inability to laud my burgeoning thinness over others.
My only respite is to fatten up my fellow competitors in two weeks, when I return.
1. They are more attractive.
2. They typically sweat less and so have less body odor than all the rest of you fatties.
3. They present less of a drain on the health care system.
4. Kate Moss says so.
5. Weight loss inspires charity. Bowflex spokesman Brian Alvarez understands this:
And you *should* feel great Brian. Keep up the good work!
...
Since we've begun this competition, I feel thinner and therefore better than before. And, as such, I feel the need, nay, the right to gawk at all the fatties of the world.
As I've mentioned earlier, I'm currently in Boston. While on my way here, I thought, what better place than the United States of America to scope out and leer at fatties? Sadly, I have been sorely mislead. After almost one week of living here, I must ask the question: "Where are all the fatties?"
Television would have you believe that 63% of American adults are overweight or obese . Yet, where are they? They should be hard to miss. I examined a number of locations, from sports bars, to Best Buy, to Fenway stadium, home of the baseball team, the Boston Red Sox. And yet, nowhere near even 50% of individuals were giant fatties. The hero of baseball, Babe Ruth, was so grossly obese that he was unable to run his own bases. But his fans, who don't even do so much as swing a bat, are often reasonably thin. What is wrong with this dangerously underweight picture of Boston?
Someone is lying to us. Either Americans are not all fatties. Or Boston represents a low-fat oasis within America. While the humanitarian in me applauds the fact that so many people here are skinny and therefore better, the sadist in me laments my inability to laud my burgeoning thinness over others.
My only respite is to fatten up my fellow competitors in two weeks, when I return.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Food for thought
I think we might have our first competition challenge!
According to The Toronto Star, burgers should not be an everyday treat. Them's fighting words, Toronto Star!
Unfortunately, Opiate, Thorn and I live within limping distance of Dangerous Dan's Diner and The Burger's Priest.
According to The Toronto Star, burgers should not be an everyday treat. Them's fighting words, Toronto Star!
Unfortunately, Opiate, Thorn and I live within limping distance of Dangerous Dan's Diner and The Burger's Priest.
What I propose is a meal together at one of the burger joints listed in the article during which every competitor must order and eat a burger. In the two hours prior to the meal, competitors may follow whatever strategy they choose to fight against the massive weight gain assault. We weigh-in the morning of then the morning after the meal. We can also measure blood pressure before and after the meal.
I'm sure this will enlighten readers the same way Super Size Me did. This is edutainment.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)